We all know the importance of love and affection in a marriage or relationship. Are you in a state of being worried and questioning your husband’s or boyfriend’s love for you? Do you think his feeling for you has changed? Maybe you’re not sure if your boyfriend still loves you like before? That is why these 11 signs that your husband doesn’t love you anymore will help you to know what to do if it’s true.
You’ve been having a bad feeling and sleepless nights about this. Do your husband’s or boyfriend’s attitude has not been the same recently? You begin to think he doesn’t love you like he used to do.
However, when you see the handwriting of his loveless on the wall, you need to take urgent action so that you can get his love back. Because for someone to be with a man or guy that doesn’t show any love for you anymore can be so frustrating.
Why signs are important?
It helps you to know what to do quickly before it’s too late.
You can easily make corrections if the problems come from you.
You can seek help if it’s what you cannot handle on your own.
Your husband or boyfriend might have other reasons why he’s distant himself from you. For you to recognize the signs can be of great help for him to open up to you.
Moreover, if it’s only that you’re not sure of his love anymore it’s a great sign that something is wrong in the relationship. This might affect the connection between you and him.
So here are some critical signs that show he doesn’t love you anymore.
His affection for you is zero
Affection is one of the essential keys in a marriage or relationship. It’s what brings people together and helps them to express their love for each other. Immediately when affection goes away or is drastically reduced, you can easily say that there is no more love. When he stops doing all that you cherish and value, then is a first and big sign that he’s no longer in love with you.
“A big sign is when he stops doing the little things that he did ‘just because,'” marriage therapist Racine Henry, Ph.D., LMFT, tells mbg. “Has he stopped making you coffee in the morning or bringing you flowers on a random Tuesday?”
Note: Different people may express love in different ways (hence, the five love languages), so a lack of gifts or kisses alone doesn’t necessarily mean your husband doesn’t love you. It’s a change in behavior and a decrease in previously present forms of affection to look out for. “A change in routine can be a glaring clue that his feelings have changed,” Henry says.
He doesn’t see you as attractive as before
It’s another sign that he doesn’t love you again. When you are not attractive to him anymore, no matter how you try to connect with him both in words and actions. He’s avoiding you as if you don’t matter. This is a serious problem because he’s someone that cannot hold back when he sees your body. But now, he doesn’t care anymore. It’s because the love and affection that will make it happen are gone.
He doesn’t want to make love and have sex with you again.
Shift in Libido
When the sexual drive is completely diminished or gone, can be a red flag that he’s no more in love with you.
“For some, a shift in libido can also be a sign that love is waning,” clinical psychologist Carla Marie Manly, Ph.D., adds, though of course there can be many reasons a husband doesn’t want sex other than a lack of love.
He’s keeping to himself alone in the house
A man that is always happy and funny in the house suddenly becomes very cold. It’s a sign that something is wrong in the relationship. When he’s now keeping to himself and doesn’t want to even see you around him. It’s a sign that his love for you has turned sour.
He spends more time outside and comes home late
This is the most common sign I guess. When a man loves to spend most of his time outside and comes home very late. It’s a sign of a lack of love. When a man doesn’t love you again, he will not like to be around you because it’s like you’re too boring to him. This is because people say, where the heart is that’s where the body and soul will be. When his heart is no longer with you, is very difficult for his physical body to be with you as well.
When a man is making excuses to be away from you or the house all the time, it could be that he’s spending his time with other people that he loves more than you. He might also be finding pleasure in another person than you. He just seems that he doesn’t want to hang out with you and suddenly his friends have taken over your space in his life.
He’s not mentally and emotionally present
Moreover, a man can actually be at home physically but not accessible mentally and emotionally to his spouse. He might choose work and hobbies over his partner. When this suddenly becomes his habit and engages in other activities than spending quality time with his spouse, then definitely is a sign that something is wrong in that home.
Many times, he tells you that he will like to be alone without your disturbance. Even when he’s free from work, he will just find something else to do that will occupy him. All these are great signs that he doesn’t love you again.
No romantic gestures toward you
When your husband suddenly withdraws from all the sweet and romantic things he does for you. It shows he doesn’t have any love for you again. It becomes a big deal to offer little help for you, fx to pick you up from work. He complains even if he doesn’t do anything. He doesn’t cherish you as before, it’s a lack of love.
When he’s holding back from you
If he doesn’t want to kiss you or give you a hug as usual or kind of hold back from you, it’s a sign that the love is no more there. Maybe he’s someone that used to give you a kiss and a warm hug whenever he comes home. Suddenly he just comes in very calmly and goes straight to the room. It’s a sign that something is fishing that is affecting his love for you.
He doesn’t initiate sex anymore
When a man just ignores you and doesn’t initiate sex like before or even at all now. It means there is a problem and his love game with you is over. He doesn’t want to have sexual intimacy and fun with you again. It is one of the common signs that he doesn’t love you again and requires urgent attention.
Sexual intimacy is one of the things that solidify bonds in a marriage or relationship. He gets irritated with every little thing which affects his mood. This happens when there is no more love and affection.
He doesn’t value you again
He suddenly wants to make his plan without asking or considering you. He’s no longer border about how you feel, he’s less concerned if you’re happy or not. He doesn’t even want to have eye contact with you. You can really see from his behavior these days that he doesn’t care. He goes out and comes in whenever he wants and you dare not challenge him.
However, he has left most of his responsibilities at home and often prefers to do things on his own. He doesn’t want to have anything that will bring you close together. It’s a sign that his love for you has grown wings and flown away.
He’s avoiding having conversations with you
Communication plays a huge role in building a stronger and healthy marriage or relationship. Whenever there is no more regular conversation between the couples, there is a problem in the relationship. When your husband or boyfriend doesn’t want to talk to you face-to-face. He prefers to drop a note and put it on the table for you to see.
A partner that always loves to share and tell you about his day is suddenly not interested in such conversation anymore. It might be a dangerous sign. However sometimes he might be tired or he’s having issue from work that makes him not interested to talk, so that doesn’t mean he’s not in love with you. That can happen once in a while but when it now becomes his habitual attitude then, something is wrong.
When your husband says he’s not in love any longer
It’s good to take it seriously when you realised that your husband’s love has been reduced. You have to consider what to do so that you can gain his love back. If you’re both willing to work together and make your marriage strong again. Even though feelings can be changed but that does not mean the marriage should be over. What you need to do is to identify what goes wrong and how you can make the corrections.
It can also happen that the intensity of his love goes down and you’re thinking maybe he doesn’t love you again. It might not be true. The situation of things might have negative impacts on your marriage and this affects his general feelings for you.
Do you think there is an issue that has made him behave differently just recently? Maybe he’s going through a difficult time and you don’t seem to understand it. Maybe you have changed yourself and you never realize it. There are so many reasons that can make people fall out of love. But, do you know it’s very possible for your marriage or relationship to come back to normal again? If both of you are willing to make it work and you will be surprised to see him loving you more than before.
How to fix the problem
You need to recognize the problem
The first step you need to take is to identify what has been changed. How did you observe his feelings? You need to clarify things and this will help you with what to do and how you will go about it. Is there anything that triggers these feelings that you’ve seen in him? You need some prooves that show that he has really changed.
Discuss with him
Communication is very important in a marriage. It’s a good idea to talk to your husband about your observation and how you feel. Don’t beat around the bush, tell him everything, and be open and honest with yourself. Ask him what’s going on in your marriage. When you want to address this issue, it’s important you do it with love and respect. Be ready to listen to his response, don’t attack him, and try not to be defensive.
However, allow him to express himself willingly, don’t force him, otherwise, it can turn into an argument that you may not like. You need to be patient and don’t interrupt him when he’s talking. It’s also advisable not to jump to the wrong assumption. You need to give him time.
Think about what to do
Now you’ve both realized that there is a problem in your marriage, you have heard him talking about if he’s still in love with you or not. What you both want is very important. Mutual talk and understanding are necessary in order to sort things out. It is possible to bring back the initial love and feelings that you have for each other. It can only happen when both of you are ready to work as a team.
But if he’s not ready to do the work with you, then it’s a dangerous sign that you need to accept and respect his feelings.
Seek help from marriage therapy
It’s very important to seek help especially when you see that your husband is not ready to work with you. You’ve tried to talk to him but all to no avail. Working with a professional marriage counselor can be of great help. It’s the best way to handle this issue especially when you’re both willing to work together and save your marriage.
Sometimes many women didn’t know how to handle this sensitive issue. In the start, they have good intentions but when they didn’t handle it carefully, then, they destroy their good intention. So it’s wise to ask for help in such a situation.
Work together as a couple
Once you’ve agreed to work to save your marriage, you need to start little by little on how to rebuild your intimacy and affection for each other. The first thing is to start trusting each other and regain true love. Don’t be too hard on yourself and expect a sudden change. It takes time and it’s a gradual process. Remember it’s like you’re just starting all over again. So be patient and make a plan together, then embark on a small change at a time.
Remember to work on yourself
When your husband is ready to fall in love with you again, you need to work on yourself too. Try to reflect on maybe there are some areas that you need to improve on. Because no one is perfect. Let your husband knows and sees that you’re ready to give him your best. When he notices that the way you respect, communicate, honor, and appreciate him has really changed, then his love for you will increase and grow stronger.
This will greatly bring a positive change to your marriage. A healthy, strong, and long-lasting marriage is inevitable.
On the other hand, if you see that nothing really happened despite all your efforts to make things work. If it’s getting worst, then you can consider another option because when there is no love and affection in the home. There is nothing you can do about that since you cannot force him to love you.